I'd decided to carve out the strangest possibly midnight route I could find. SO rather than heading out on the A44 all the way, or othersuch boredoms I set off down a little one track lane aghast at the lack of signs pointing to 'LONDON 150miles'! Heading through such little places of arcane wonder such as Risbury, Pencombe, Bosbury etc at the witching hour, quite spectacular, invisible and the landscape menacing, with illuminated moths providing an incredible fireworks display , interstellar travel!
Made my first tea stop in Tewkesbury, about 2-3 am, shared my baccy with some local chavs who hid in an alleyway everytime a car approached with shouts of 'the old bill!!'. Tewkesbury was to be my location for at least another half hour however as finding 'my way' out of there took about 3 very lengthy sorties before I finally found the right road.
Next up into the Cotswolds, through the woods and now heavy rain, I see a sign for Bourton-on-the-water. A mere 20 mile diversion, irresistable. Growing up in Walsall in the black country, we had gone on a school trip once to this ridiculously idyllic little village and it'd comprehensively blown my mind, having previously thought of Willenhall as the picturesque English idyll. Returning there at quarter to 4 in the morning. Quite incredible, Like a conqueror, Emporer by night. The whole town existing solely for the pleasure of me and a Heron who stood just metres away from me, quite unpeturbed, moving silently through the stream like a phantom. Took a pee down a nice cobbled lane, another rolly and refuel and I headed off, the sun having risen in the meantime. Set off in search of the A40 and the real world inhabited by menfolk. No more suprises I thought, just as I suddenly found that the A40 had become the M40 without even a hint!! Now I'm off the L's but the idea of going on a motorway still absolutely terrified me but there I was, with my little Edelweiss, half a pint of milk and some tea bags strapped to the back of my steed, now being overtook approx every 1.4 seconds, till I found my way off at High Wycombe. An impatient overtaking manouever sees my beautiful Alpine flower sent flying into the bonnet of a very confused Ford Mondeo, though I only realise the absence near Ealing!
Eventually made my way into the flyovers and 'STAY IN LANE' roads approaching Central London. A taste of things to come as a giant 4x4 suddenly somehow squeezes up next to me in a cue. I give him evils. Little did I know about driving in London! After diverting myself across most of the wrong bit of North London, I finally find my way to Walthamstow. A devil of a pothole sends my fuel tank flying through the air going over the hackney marshes, had to do a quarter of a mile u-turn to find some funny foreign guy wearing sunglasses walking up the pavement sniffing my petrol, however he turns saint (possibly the fumes) and scurries along gathering my lost bungees and under the duress of a rather hurried London Bus driver I'm heading down the road one handed with a jumble of fuel and bungee cords to find somewhere to stop!. Finally found my destination about 10 am! An epic journey!
After couple nights in Walthamstow I take the cub down to Islington for a gig and leave it parked there in some nice back street then head to new cross where I ended up squatting for about 5 alcohol soaked indifferent days though I did remember to go and fetch me bike! A beautiful little journey in itself, finding myself, much to my suprise, riding over the famous Tower Bridge. Finally dragged myself away from the New Cross booze den and back home, this time employing a more boring route and totally uneventful journey, except for one point refueling in Chipping Norton about midnight and deranged looking man approaches me wielding a zippo lighter and a glazed expression. 'What the f*** are you doing!!' I screamed, then he asked me for a drop of petrol for his lighter. Look out for the man with the singed eyebrows in Chipping Norton. Really thought I was about to meet my maker at that point!
So Boudu pulled through, and I learned how to ride like a Londoner, over taking, under taking, filtering, honking the horn, riding the wrong way down Edgeware Road for 2 miles then twice round the Marble Arch roundabout aka Campsite twice in rush hour. Good times!!
